Two days ago, the Dean of Academics told me that the class I would normally be teaching starting tomorrow wasn’t going to be offered. That left me with no work at that college for the next five weeks.
Yesterday, some of my students told me they were scheduled for that class, but there was no instructor listed. I didn’t inquire. I’d caught the Dean, who used to be my friend when she was still an instructor, in an apparent lie, and I didn’t feel like being confrontational.
Today, after proctoring my final exam, I found out that “my” next class has been given to a new hire. Hm. Maybe they’re paying him less than me – after all, I’ve been there for nearly four years. Maybe it’s yet another power struggle between the Dean and the Campus President; I almost lost a class before in a past round of their combat.
Regardless, I’m definitely experiencing some dhukka (suffering) today. It’s interesting to take a step back and observe. The Buddha taught that one of the causes of suffering is attachment or clinging. Since nothing ever stays the same, even when things are going well, they eventually turn to shit. (I’m pretty sure that some Zen Master put it exactly that way at least once.)
I really loved this job, loved my students, and even tolerated the commute. I suppose, without noticing it, I got attached. Now change has come, and I’m miserable! Luckily, I have just enough awareness to realize that this, too, shall pass.